Active and passive voice connors writing center dimond library 329. Wordy, dense documents are confusing to the reader. Then follow the tips below to rework your sentences until you find a pleasing balance. A highperforming school is a school that works hard to educate students and to engage their communities to support their learning and growth of all students. Active and passive voice university of new hampshire. Harris abstract literacy is an increasingly important factor as schools focus on improving student achievement. Wordy study with middle and high school students lindsay a.
Eliminate slow windups and redundancies, such as in my opinion, my point is that, etc. Donts dos big, showy words wordy, dense sentence im abbreviation looks sloppy and unprofessional passive voice study the following examples to see how to achieve a conversational, yet professional. Use contractions, use possessives, split long sentences tips. The wordy editing process involves correcting grammar and punctuation and ensuring correct usage, internal consistency in usage, and coherent logical structure. Revising wordy sentences rewrite the following sentences to be more concise. Before turning in any assignment, make sure you read it over for awkward sentences. Unless you have a reason not to, use the active voice. The original sentence is wordy because we can express this thought using fewer words. W3b replace be verbs that result in dull or wordy sentences. Donts dos big, showy words wordy, dense sentence im abbreviation looks sloppy and unprofessional passive voice study the following examples to see how to achieve a conversational, yet professional tone. On the other hand, if a document only includes very long, complex sentences and an advanced vocabulary, readers may get frustrated as they try to figure out what those sentences and words mean. Revising for clarity of meaning often makes prose more concise and vice versa. The forms of be be, am, is, are, was, were, being, been work well when you want to link a subject to a noun that clearly renames it or to an adjective that describes it. These can be sentences providing evidence that support your claim, narrative elements that add to a description you began in the topic sentence, etc.
Burning words succinct writing effectively engraves are good. Revise these sentences to state their meaning in fewer words. Wordy i would appreciate it if you would bring to the attention of your drafting officers the administrators dislike of long sentences and paragraphs in messages to the field and in other items. Telling readers how to interpret your ideas makes your sentences wordy and can. Other writers tend to write long sentences, which can make the writing seem longwinded or wordy, even if it isnt.
How to write clear, concise, and direct sentences 1. Im going to ride my bike countnoncount to the park countnoncount so i can play in the grass countnoncount and get some fresh air countnoncount. Improving sentence style in addition to combining some sentences,you can also make your writing more effective by revising stringy and wordy sentences to make them shorter and clearer. Clarity and conciseness clarity and conciseness often go hand in hand. Recognize your own wordy sentences and know how to edit them to be clearer. Understanding the use and effect of both voices will help you compose clearer, more powerful sentences. Use a variety of sentence structures and vocabulary for readers, documents that only use short, very simple sentences or words can be boring and repetitious. Good writing contains sentences of a variety of lengths. Learn how to avoid wordy sentences created using powtoon free sign up at youtube create animated videos. Your reader will stay involved if you mix long and short sentences and include simple,compound, and complex sentences in your writing.
Editing for wordiness school of liberal arts iupui. Unless you are william faulkner and you arenthes dead, you should never. Toprated online proofreading and copyediting services. Guided practice edit the following paragraph to make any wordy sentences as short as possible without changing their meaning. Reworking sentence structure brainstorming techniques.
Eliminating excessive, confusing, or redundant words from sentences can oftentimes make meanings much clearer. A sentence should contain no unnecessary words, a paragraph no unnecessary sentences, for the same. One contributing factor to wordy writing is the addition of unnecessary words, phrases, and ideas. Writing shorter sentences will force you to think through and communicate your ideas more clearly. There are several reasons that wordiness impacts clarity. Sentence combination and word choice clarity is one of the most important elements of any written text. The beautiful, majestic, breathtaking city of rome was visited by many tourists from america during the hot summer. Wordiness occurs when a writer uses more words than necessary to express a thought. Some writers write short sentences, which can make an essay seem choppy. Another thing to avoid is the overuse of qualifiers. At the heart of every good sentence is a strong, precise verb.
Use the paramedic method to fix the following sentences. When your instructors write things like awkward, vague, or wordy on your draft, they are letting you know that they want you to work on word choice. Writing concise sentences in addition to reading this section of the guide and taking the quizzes at its conclusion, we urge you to visit william strunks elements of style, which has had a salutary effect on. Revision strategies, such as richard lanhams paramedic method, help writers recognize wordy sentences and provide steps to write more concisely. Plain english means analyzing and deciding what information investors need to make informed decisions, before words, sentences, or paragraphs are considered. These sentences feel watered downlike you have to do a lot of work to gain a little information. The computer reads in a program file from disk and executes the contents cast iron could be cast in molds for larger parts, such as engine cylinders and gears, but was difficult to work with a file and could not be hammered.
Highlight long sentences in one color and short sentences in another color. Since the dog is the subject of both sentences, you can combine the sentences by using and or by using one sentence to modify the other. Learn wordy sentence with free interactive flashcards. Verbosity excess word use is often a result of idea generation, and wordy sentences and paragraphs, especially in early drafts. This task can be difficult for the writer himherself or for a subject matter expert, so have a friend or colleagues read your document and provide feedback. The subject is the person or thing that does something or that is described in the sentence. Nov 19, 2016 learn how to avoid wordy sentences created using powtoon free sign up at youtube create animated videos and animated presenta. Clarity and conciseness this handout offers tips for keeping academic writing clear and concise. Active voice and passive voice tippie college of business. Avoid passive voice, needless repetition, and wordy phrases and clauses. Heres your quick introduction to the basic english sentence structure. Mark whether the nouns in this sentence are count or noncount nouns.
If you want to know the trick, read the stepby step rehabilitation. The beautiful, majestic, breathtaking city of rome was. It is believed by the candidate that a ceiling must be. The last point i want to make is that hard work can bring success. Choose from different sets of wordy sentence flashcards on quizlet. Practice in cutting the clutter in writing thoughtco. Express actions in verbs avoid nominalization consider this sentence.
Passive sentences are usually wordier than active sentences, and they can clutter your paper with unnecessary words. The computer reads in a program file from disk and executes the contents cast iron could be cast in molds for larger parts, such as engine cylinders and gears, but was difficult to work with a file and. Sample sentence in my opinion, in response to the issue of wordy sentences in college writing, it is my belief that a tool for revision is needed. The cause of our schools failure at teaching basic skills is not understanding the influence of cultural background on learning. The forms of be be, am, is, are, was, were, being, been work well when you want to link a subject to a noun.
Wordy is the realtime, human proofreading and copyediting service. Keep in mind that the supporting sentences should all relate to the topic sentence for that paragraph, not to another topic. Wordy i would appreciate it if you would bring to the attention of your drafting officers the administrators dislike of long sentences and paragraphs in messages to the field and in other items drafted for her signature or approval, as well as in all correspondence, reports, and studies. Editing for wordiness words are like acid the more theyre condensed, the more they burn.
This handout will explain some common issues related to word choice and give you strategies for choosing the best words as you revise your drafts. This handout offers tips for keeping academic writing. Literacy skills in reading and writing are critical components needed for both access to the general curriculum and for successful academic achievement. A few inches of snow on the ground is all that is necessary in order for a person to be able to go sledding. Eliminating wordiness this quiz was prepared by michael dolan, a student in professor karyn holliss tutor training course at villanova university. O8en,weuseseveralsmallandambiguouswordstoexpressaconcept buttherearelotsof. Proofreading exercise commonly confused words pdf file. Many very smart people believe that they sound even smarter when they write long sentences that contain many long words. Passive sentences are usually wordier than active sentences, and they. Exercises 1 and 2 contain wordy sentences while exercise 3 is an extended. Using three simple strategies will help avoid wordiness and thus make sentences more. Wordy student papers are often cluttered with pointless filler.
Terry fox is perhaps one of canadas greatest modern heroes because of the fact that he did something amazing even though he was disabled and had lost his leg. Passive sentences can also leave readers wanting more information. People are creating stereotypes about minority students that is affecting their ability. The two sentences, while written differently, contain the same information. If a sentence doesnt have a subject and a verb, it is not a complete sentence e. The numbers in the margin refer to appropriate revision strategies in section 16 of the bedford handbook, seventh edition. Redundant information should be avoided in order to reduce wordiness in your essay writing. The verb is the action the person or thing takes or the description of the person or thing. A highperforming school is a school that works hard to educate students and to engage their communities to support their learning.
If you can remove a word while keeping the sentences meaning, the sentence is wordy. Wordy sentences wordy sentences contain many unnecessary words. Basic english sentence structure all the parts of speech in english are used to make sentences. Using three simple strategies will help avoid wordiness and thus make sentences more concise, more effective, and easier to understand. The accident occurred due to the fact that there was nothing to prevent it. Active voice and passive voice using the active voice can create clear, concise sentences. Before turning in any assignment, make sure you read it over for awkward sentences, phrases, or unclear language. Eliminate redundancies writers often repeat themselves in order to add emphasis to their writing, but in most cases it has the opposite effect. The accident occurred because there was nothing to.
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